31Dec2008

So finally 2008 finished....
and here is the last joke for the year.....

A new teacher had a very dirty pupil in her class. At first she didn't know what to do, but finally she sent him home with a note to his mother, saying he was not clean and he should bathe more often.

The next morning the boy came back to school, and pinned to his shirt was the following note: Don't smell him - teach him!
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So resolution

1. Take bath.
2. Dont take bath let the others bear.

So whats your one........!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

30Dec2008

In a small town in India, there is a small store. And in the store is a magic Mirror of Truth.
If you go up to it and tell the truth, you get a shiny piece of gold. But if you lie, you disappear.
A very ugly brunette came in, stood in front of the Mirror of Truth and said, "I think I am the prettiest woman in all of World!"
And poof, she disappeared. Next came a very ugly redhead.
She stood before the Mirror of Truth and said, "I think I am the prettiest woman in all of Universe." Poof! She disappeared!
Then a Sardar came into the store. He stood before the Mirror of Truth and said, "I think..." Poof! He disappeared.

29Dec2008

एक कंजूस व्यक्ति ने काफ़ी ज़्यादा मात्रा मे नीद की गोलियां खा लीं और बेहोश हो गया ! अस्पताल में डॉक्टर ने पूछा कि आपने ख़ुदकुशी करने की कोशिश क्यों की ?

वो बोला , नहीं डॉक्टर साहब मैंने ख़ुदकुशी की कोशिश नहीं की। मैंने इतनी गोलियां इसलिए खाई क्योंकि ये सारी गोलियां कल एक्सपाइर हो जानी थीं ! अगर मैं इन को आज नही खाता तो फ़िर ये किसी काम की नही रहती

26Dec2008

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.

Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Highway 401. Please be careful!"

"Darling," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"

24Dec2008

HAPPY CRISTIMAS........
=======================
It's Christmas time and Paddy and Shaun decided to go look for a Christmas Tree.

They gathered their axe, a sled, and a broom to brush the trees off so they can get a good look at them.

When they finally reach a fine stand of trees, Shaun brushes off the first tree, and stands back with Paddy to look at it.

"Well, Paddy, What do you think?"

"Sorry, Shaun, this tree won't do. Let's try another one."

They come upon another nice tree, Shaun brushes it off, and they both look at it.

"How about this one, Paddy?"

"Not quite, Shaun. Let's keep looking."

This goes on until nightfall. Both Paddy and Shaun are cold, tired, and hungry.

"Well, Paddy, what do we do now?"

"Shaun, I think we should take home the next tree we find, whether it has lights on it or not."

23Dec2008

A Family Saw ""Sholay"" Movie
Came Back Home And Husband Romantically Said To Wife
"" Nach Basanti Nach""
Child Added
""Nahin Basanti Is Kute K Samne Mat Nachna""

22Dec2008

A pipe bursts in a doctor's house. He called the plumber. The plumber arrived, umpacked the tools, did some plumber-type things and handed the doctor the bill for $600,The doctor exclaimed 'This is ridiculous! I dont even make that much as a doctor!'The plumber answered quietly, 'Neither did i when i was a doctor.

19Dec2008

Little Johnny returns from school and says his teacher slap him today.
His father asks: "Why?"
Johnny says: "The teacher asked me 'How much is 2x3?' and I said '6'"
Father: "But that's right!"
Johnny: "Then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'"
Father reacts: "What's the fuck difference?"
Johnny: "That's exactly I said!"

18Dec2008

दिल्ली का किस्सा.....
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एक दिन मैं दिल्ली पहुँचा, स्टेशन पे एक कुली से बहार जाने का रास्ता पूंछा. कुली ने कहा बाहर जाके पूछो. मैंने ख़ुद ही रास्ता दूंढ लिया, बाहर जाके टैक्सी वाले से पूंछा , "भाई साब पालम का कितना लोगे ?" जवाब मिला , "बेचना नही है .." टैक्सी छोड़ , मैंने बस पकड़ ली , कंडक्टर से पूंछा , "जी .. क्या में सिगरेट पी सकता हूँ ?" वो गुर्रा कर बोला , "हरगिज़ नही , यहाँ सिगरेट पीना मन है " मैंने कहा , "पर वो जनाब तो पी रहे है !"
फिर से गुर्राया , "उसने मुझसे पूंछा नही है " पालम पंहुचा , होटल गया . मेनेजर से कहा , "मुझे रूम चाहिए , सातवे मंजिल पे " मेनेजर ने कहा , "रहने के लिए या कूदने के लिए ?" रूम पंहुचा , वेटर से कहा , "एक पानी का गिलास मिलेगा ."
उसने जवाब दिया , "नही साहब , यहाँ तो सारे कांच के मिलते है ." होटल से निकला दोस्त के घर जाने के लिए , रस्ते में एक साहब से पूंछा , "जनाब , ये सड़क कहा को जाती है ?" जनाब हंस कर बोले , "पिछले बीस साल से देख रहन हूँ , यही पड़ी है ...."
दोस्त के घर पंहुचा , तो मुझे देखते ही चोंक पड़ा उसने पुछा , "दिल्ली कैसे आना हुआ ?" अब तक तो मुझे भी आदत पड़ गई थी , तो मैंने भी जवाब दिया ,"ट्रेन से .." मेरी आवभगत
करने के लिए दोस्त ने अपनी बीवी से कहा ,"अरे सुनती हो ... मेरा दोस्त पहली बार घर आया है , उसे कुछ तजा तजा खिलाओ .." सुनते ही भाभीजी ने घर की साडी खिड़किया और दरवाजे खोल दिए . कहा , "ताजी हवा खा लीजिये ." दोस्त ने फिर से बड़ी प्यार से बीवी से कहा , "अरे सुनती हो ...इन्हे जरा अपना चालीस साल पुराना आचार तो दिखाना ." भाभीजी एक बाटली मे रखा आचार ले आई , मैंने भी अपनापन दिखाते हुए भाभीजी से कहा , "भाभीजी , आचार सिर्फ़ दिखाएंगी , चाखायेंगी नही ....?" भाभीजी ने टका जवाब दिया , "युही अगर सब को चखाती तो आचार चालीस साल पुराना कैसे होता ..?" थोडी देर बाद देखा , भाभीजी अपने पोते को सूला रही थी , साथ में लोरी भी गा रही थी , "डिप्लोमा सो जा , डिप्लोमा सो जा ." लोरी सून में हैरान हुआ और दोस्त से पुछा , "यार ये डिप्लोमा क्या है ?" दोस्त ने जवाब दिया , "मेरे पोते का नाम , बेटी बम्बई गई थी , डिप्लोमा लेने के लिए और साथ में इसे ले आई , इसीलिए हमने इसका नाम डिप्लोमा रख दिया ." फिर मैंने पूंछा , "आजकल तुम्हारी बेटी क्या कर रही है ?" दोस्त ने जवाब दिया , "बम्बई गई है , डिग्री लेने के लिए ...."

17Dec2008

Police :we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?
Thief Sardar : Yes. (lie dectector blows up)

16Dec2008

There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck.

In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.

He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I `ve kidnapped you."

Sardarji then wrote a note saying:

"I `ve kidnapped your kid.

Tomorrow morning, put Rs.2,00,000 in a paper bag and put it at the mango tree on the north side of the city playground".

Signed: "A Sardarji".

Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid `s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.

The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was kept at the mango tree.The boy was sitting next to the bag. Sardarji opened up the bag and found the Rs.2,00,000 in cash with a note saying:

"How can a sardarji do this to a fellow Sardarji?

Take the money, and Please leave my son."

15Dec2008

Santa walks into a bar in Ludhiana and asks for three beers. The bartender puts them up and then watches Santa go through a peculiar ritual.
"Happy Birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday" Each time he says the word he drinks the beer. Then he pays and walks out.
One year later he enters the same bar again and orders the same thing. The bartender watches him go through the same ritual. Curious, he asks Santa why.
"Well" Santa says, "I have a friend in Canada and a friend in Sydney. We have our birthdays on the same day. We can`t be together so we have agreed that on this day we will each go into our local pub and have a round of drinks for each other. We have been doing this for 20 years since we were 18."
The next year Santa comes in and asks the bartender for two beers. The bartender, a bit taken aback, places two beers in front of Santa and watches him say "happy birthday, happy birthday!"
The bartender asks "So which one died?"
"No one."
"But you only ordered two drinks!"
"Yeah, well, I`ve given up drinking."

12Dec2008

KIDS LETTERS TO GOD
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11Dec2008

British:Y u Indians r in dffrnt colors? look we r all white!
Indian:Horses r in differnt colors, but donkeys r all d same!
PROUD 2b INDIANS!!

10Dec2008

सरदार जी रास्ते में चले जा रहे थे, अचानक अपने पैर बचाते हुए आगे बाद गए, थोडा आगे गए फ़िर मुड़ कर वापस आए और बोले ये चीज मैंने कही देखी हैं, पर नाम याद नही आ रहा, थोडी देर सोचा फ़िर आगे बढ़ गए, फ़िर वापस आए फ़िर हाथ लगा कर देखा, फ़िर बोले यार लगता तो वो हैं, फ़िर आगे बाद गए, फ़िर वापस आए, और फ़िर सरदार जी ने उस चीज को थोड़ा सा खा लिया, फ़िर बोले - साला गोबर ही हैं, अच्छा हुआ की पैर पर नही लगा!

05Dec2008

Sardar ji aapni nayi gadi main chandigarh 4 hrs main paunch gaye par wapusi main 10 ganthe lage ... WHY?...

Give the answer .......... !!!!!!!!!!!
and will attractive prizes.

04Dec2008

ek banda liver ki bimar se mar gaya bhagwaan aaye bole koi adhuri ichaa.. sharabhi bola bhagwaan aagle janam main 1 extra liver laga kar bhejna..

03Dec2008

A man sat quietly reading his morning paper one Sunday morning.

Suddenly,he is knocked almost senseless by his wife, who stands behind him holding a frying pan in hand.

Man: What was that for?

Wife: Why do you have a piece of paper in your pocket with "Mary" written on it?

Man: Oh honey, don't you remember two weeks ago when I went to the horseraces? "Mary" was the name of the horse I bet on.

The wife was satisfied, and appologized for bonking him.

Three days later he is again sitting reading the paper when once again he is bonked on the head.

Man: What's that for this time?
Wife: Your horse called

02Dec2008

त्रिकाल - यार तू लड़कियों को घूरता तो बहुत हैं शादी क्यों नही कर लेता.
विकाल - अबे साले, लडकियां हाथी की तरह होती हैं, मैं उन को देखना पसंद करता हूँ पालना नही. समझा

01Dec2008

Air hostess sardar se: Sir aap kia lena pasand karainge?
Sardar: Mere lea TAWEEZ wali chai lao.
Airhostess:Sir woh taweez nahi TEA BAG hai .... :)

28Nov2008

Three General was discussing "Whose soldier have more GUTS"

The American general called for one of his men and told him to jump down the ship and take a round swimming around the moving ship. The soldier did as he was told.
When he came back from the water the American said - "See the guts!"

Now the German general called out for one of his men and asked him to take two similar rounds. The soldier did as he was told.
When he came back from the water the German said - "See the guts!".

Now the Indian General called out for one of his soldier and asked him to take five similar rounds.
The soldier promptly replied,"Tere baap ka naukar hooon kya...?????"
At this the general proudly said, "See the GUTS!!"

27Nov2008

How to Handle a Traffic Stop

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the registration for this vehicle?

Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: This car is stolen?

Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

Driver: Yes sir, that's where I put it after I shot the owner of this car and stuffed his body in the
trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!

Driver: Yes sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation.

The Captain slowly approached the driver...

Captain: Sir, can I see you license? Driver: Sure, here it is. It was valid.

Captain: Who's car is this?

Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration card.

Captain: Could you slowly open the glove box so I can see if there's a gun in there?

Driver: Yes sir, but there's no gun in it.

Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told there was a body in it.

Driver: No problem.

The trunk is opened: no body.

Captain: I don't understand. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a body in the trunk.

Driver: Yeah, and I'll bet he told you that I was speeding, too

26Nov2008

दो बुजुर्ग मिले , एक दूसरे से हालचाल लेने लगे।
' कहिए क्या हाल हैं '
' बस भगवान की कृपा है '
बड़ा लड़का शेयर मार्किट में है , दूसरा इनवेस्टमंट बैंकिंग में है , तीसरा एयरवेज़ में है , चौथा सॉफ्टवेयर इंजीनियर है और सबसे छोटा पान वाला है , आजकल तो घर छोटा लड़का ही चला रहा है।

25Nov2008

Do Dost they. Lekin ek din ek dost ka maut ho gaya aur police investigate karne ke liye aaya aur uske dost ko sawal poochne laga…

Police: "Tumhara dost kaise mara?"

Sardar: "Pata nahi sahab, woh bola mere pet mein chuhe kud rahe hai toh maine usko chuha marne ki dawa de di."

24Nov2008

Banta gets on a plane and sits next to the window.
A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong, mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him.
The huge man glares threateningly at Banta, crowds him so much that he`s flattened against the window, and immediately falls asleep.

After the plane takes off, Banta starts to feel a little air sick, but he`s afraid to wake the big guy up to ask if he can go to the bathroom.

After a few attempts, he realizes that he can`t climb over him, and so Banta is sitting there, looking at the big guy, trying to decide what to do.

Suddenly, the plane hits an air pocket and an uncontrollable wave of nausea passes over Banta.
He just can`t hold it in any longer and finally pukes all over the big guy`s chest.

About five minutes later the big guy wakes up, looks down, and sees the vomit all over him.

"So," Banta says brightly, "are you feeling better now?"

21Nov2008

Santa was on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark night and in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling and no car went by.
The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly, he saw a car coming towards him and stop.
Santa, without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door and only then realized that there`s nobody behind the wheel! The car starts very slowly.
Santa looks at the road and sees a curve coming his way. Scared, he starts to pray, begging for his life. He hasn`t come out of shock when, just before the car hits the curve, a hand appears thru the window and moves the wheel. Santa, paralyzed in terror, watched how the hand appears every time they are approaching a curve.
Santa, gathering strength, gets out of the car and runs all the way to the nearest town. Wet and in shock he goes into a bar, asks for two shots of whiskey, and starts telling everybody about the horrible experience he just went through.
A silence enveloped everybody when they realize that Santa was crying and wasn`t drunk.
About half an hour later two guys walked in the same bar and one said to the other, "Look, that`s the asshole that got in the car while we were pushing it!"

20Nov2008

Mohan's father comes home from his doctor and, though usually quite active with his grand-children, seems to make every effort to avoid them this day.
Mohan notices his dad avoiding the kids and asks him why this is so.
Immediately the old man whisks his medicine prescription out of his pocket and hands it to Mohan.

His father said, "Read that label. That's why!"
Mohan takes the bottle and reads, "Take two pills a day. KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN."

19Nov2008

A Sardar received an invitation, to a party
which said "Black Tie Only"!!

When he went to the party he was surprised to
find the other invitees wearing trousers and shirts
as well !!!!

18Nov2008

Sweetest kiss- On the head.
Loveliest kiss- On cheeks!
Most romantic kiss- On the lips!
N the hottest kiss?
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On d bike's silencer.

17Nov2008

MOHAN- tu to office me bada SHER bankar ghumta hai,
ghar me kya ho jata he?

SOHAN- hota to SHER hi hu,
bas "DURGA" sawar ho jati hai.

14Nov2008

KINDLY COMMENT WHAT WAS YOUR OPINION

OK guys lets just take a break form these jokes and funny pics and lets play a game. This is a mind testing game and I hope u guys will find it interesting.

The subject line if you are among the 98% or the 2%. You'll understand what That means after you finish taking the "test".

Just follow the instructions as quickly as possible.

Not go to the next calculation before you have finished the previous one. Else you will loose the fun

You do not ever need to write or remember the answers, just do it using your mind.
You'll be surprised after the results.

Here we go now,

How much is:

15 + 6

3 + 56

89 + 2

12 + 53

75 + 26

25 + 52

63 + 32

Know! Calculations are hard work, but it's nearly over..

Me on, one more…

123 + 5

Quick! Think about a color and a tool!

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You just thought about a red hammer, didn't you?

If this is not your answer, you are among 2% of people who have a different, if not abnormal, mind.

98% Of the folks would answer a red hammer while doing this exercise.

13Nov2008

मोनू (मां से)- आज सुबह जब मैं पापा के साथ बस में आ रहा था तो उन्होंने एक औरत के लिए मुझसे अपनी सीट छोड़ने को कहा।
मां (मोनू से)- बेटा, ये तो अच्छी बात है। बड़ों का सम्मान करना चाहिये।
मोनू - मगर मां, मैं तो पापा की गोद में बैठा हुआ था।

12Nov2008

Galileo used 2 study in small lamp,
Graham bell used 2 study in candle,
Shakespear used 2 study in stret lite.

Mujhe samaj mein nahi aata..
sale din mein jakh marte the kya?

11Nov2008

बेटाः मां आपने तो कहा था परियों के पंख होते हैं और वे उड़ती हैं ?
मां : हां बेटा, ऐसा होता है।

बेटाः कल पापा अपनी नौकरानी से कह रहे थे कि तुम परी हो, वह कब उड़ेगी।
मां : बेटा वह कल सुबह ही उड़ जाएगी।

10Nov008

- There is always a "DRIVE SLOW" board near boy's schools, but not near girl's college.Why?
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- COZ vehicles automatically go slow.

07Nov2008

Boy and girl both are playing ludo!!
Boy:- Lets play a game. Agar 1,2,3,4,5 aaya toh I will kiss you.
Girl:- Agar 6 aaya toh?
Boy:- Kabhi ludo nahi kheli kya, Agar 6 aaya toh dobara meri bari.

06Nov2008

एक गाड़ी चलाने वाले ने स्कूल जाते बच्चे के ऊपर कीचड़ फेंक दिया। बच्चा ज़ोर - ज़ोर से रोने लगा। ड्राइवर ने बाहर निकलकर अपनी जेब से एक चॉकलेट निकाला और बोला - बेटे यह ले लो और चुप हो जाओ।

इतना कह कर वह चला गया। बच्चा चुप हो गया और उस आदमी की गाड़ी के पास गया। उसने एक पत्थर से गाड़ी का शीशा तोड़ डाला। ड्राइवर गुस्से में चिल्लाने लगा तो बच्चे ने अपने जेब से एक चॉकलेट निकालकर उसके हाथ पर रखी और बोला - यह ले लो और चुप हो जाओ।

05Nov2008

लड़का - बस, ट्रेन, और लड़की एक जैसे होते हैं, एक जाती हैं तो दूसरी आती हैं.
लड़की - ऑटो, टैक्सी, और लड़के एक जैसे होते हैं, एक बुलाओ चार चले आते हैं.

हैप्पी दिवाली......!!!!!!!!!!

Humm today I am flying back to india.....for diwali....

Happy diwali to all of you..

Take care and have a great diwali.

May this God burn all your worries and full your life with happiness....

17Oct2008

समंदर के किनारे बैठे हैं , कभी तो लहर आएगी। किस्मत बदले न बदले , चप्पल तो धुल जाएगी।


I asked Abhishek what is the difference between old Umrao Jaan and new Umrao Jaan? Abhishek: nayi wali se apni setting hai. aur old wali se papa ki thi.


Ek sardar ke pass blank message aya,sardar ne us number pe phone kar k bola. :"tum ko pata hai yara, tumhare mobile ka ink khatam ho gaya hai."


पंखा मेल होता है या फीमेल ? बोलो , नहीं पता। मैं बताता हूं , अगर पंखा खेतान का हो तो मेल ओर उषा का हो तो फीमेल।

16Oct2008

Attitute
========
एक साहब के 100 वें जन्मदिन पर एक पत्रकार ने उनका इंटरव्यू लिया। चलते समय पत्रकार ने कहा , ' मुझे आशा है कि अगले साल भी आज ही के दिन आपसे बातचीत करने आऊंगा।' बुजुर्ग बोले -'जरूर आओगे', अभी तुम्हारी उम्र ही क्या है !'

15Oct2008

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer when all of a sudden he said aloud, "Lord grant me one wish".
The sky clouded and a booming voice said, "Because you have tried to be faithful I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want to".
The Lord answered, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the logistics of that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time to think of another wish, a wish you think would honor and glorify me".
The man thought for a long time and finally said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know what they feel inside , what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say 'nothing', and how I can make a woman truly happy?"
God took a deep breath and said, "OK, YOU WANT TWO LANES OR FOUR ON THAT BRIDGE???"

14Oct2008

एक बस में बहुत भीड़ होने के कारण, एक लड़की एक लड़के से बोली "भाई जान जरा साइड देना". लड़का बोला- "यार Confuse क्यों कर रही हैं या तो 'भाई' बोल या फ़िर 'जान' बोल".

13Oct2008

एक सरदार के ऊपर कबूतर के टट्टी कर दी,
सरदार गुस्से मैं बोला- साले तेरी माँ ने तेरे को कच्छा पहनना नही सिखाया क्या?
कबूतर गुस्से मैं बोला - साले तू क्या कच्छा पहन के करता हैं?

10Oct2008

100 साल का एक बुड्ढा मरने के बाद जब स्वर्ग में पहुंचा , तो वहां की रौनक और अप्सराओं को देख कर उदास हो कर बोला: ओ गॉड , अगर मैं बाबा के सिखाए योग और प्राणायाम के चक्कर में ना पड़ता , तो यहां पहले ही आ गया होता।

09Oct2008

शंकर अपने पूरे परिवार के साथ लड़की देखने पहुंचा। उसके सामने परिवार वालों ने लड़की के गुणो की प्रशंसा शुरू कर दी।
कहाः लड़की की आवाज़ कोयल जैसी है , गर्दन तो मोरनी के जैसी है , चाल हिरणी जैसी और स्वभाव में से तो गाय है। ' शंकर: जी , लड़की में कोई इंसानी गुण भी हैं या नही?

08Oct2008

बंटू मम्मी से - माँ इस बार हम सारे फूलझडिया और पटाके इस दूकान से लेंगे.
माँ बंटू से - पर बेटा ये कोई पटाके की दूकान थोडी हैं ये तो गर्ल हॉस्टल हैं,
बंटू - पर पापा तो कह रहे थे की सरे पटाके और फूलझडिया यही रहती हैं.

07Oct2008

sardar by mistake goes into ladies toilet,
all ladies suddenly stand up!
sardar: izzat dil mai ho bus yahi kafi hota hai, Betho Betho

06Oct2008

भगवान शंकर ध्यान में बैठे थे. इतने में वहा माता पार्वती आ गई.
देखती है तो भगवान शंकर ध्यान करते हूए मस्त मंद मंद मुस्कुरा रहे थे. थोडी देर में जब भगवान उठ गए तो माता पार्वती ने पुछा,' महादेव.. आप ध्यान करते हूए क्यो मुस्कुरा रहे थे.?
अरे कुछ नही पार्वती ... यह मेरे गले में पडा सांप जो गुदगुदी कर रहा था.

03Oct2008

एक बहुत कंजूस व्यक्ति था, उसकी कंजूसी की मिसाल सुनिए, "उस के पास एक घी का डिब्बा था. जब वो और उस का परिवार साथ बेठ कर खाना खाता था तो सब लोग रोटी मैं घी लगाने के लिए डिब्बे से रोटी को रगड़ कर रोटी खाते थे. वो घी का डिब्बा पिछले १० साल से ख़तम नही हुआ था क्यों की वो कभी खुला हे नही था. तो एसा था उस कंजूस का परिवार.
एक बार की बात हैं कंजूस काम से काम से बाहर गया था, पर गलती से वो घी के डिब्बे को अलमारी मैं बंद कर के चला गया, जब उस का परिवार खाने के लिए बेठे तो सब को घी की याद आई वो लोग जब अलमारी के पास गए तो अलमारी बंद थी तो उन होने अपनी अपनी रोटी अलमारी के ताले मैं रगड़ कर खा की.
जब कंजूस वापस आया तो सब लोगो के बताया की कैसे उन्होंने उस की गैरहाजरी मैं घी खाया, कंजूस ने सब को २ लगाये और बोला - "सालो एक दिन बिना घी के रोटी नही खा सकते थे"

02Oct2008

A Sardar Prays Daily for 2 hours"Hey VaheGuru meri Lottery lagade.
After 11 yrs
VaheGuru angrily appears & says - Abe Sardar 1 bar ticket to le…

30Sep2008

Air Hostess to Lalu
Sir r u vegeter-ian or nonvegeter-ian?
LALU - Im ind-ian.
SHE - no, sir! Are you shaaka-hari or maasan-hari?
LALU - na re sasuri. I m Bi-hari.

29Sep2008

पेपर में एक प्रश्न आया ,' चैलेंज किसे कहते हैं ?' मोनू ने सारे पेज़ खाली छोड़कर आखिरी पेज़ पर लिखा ,' पास करके दिखाओ , ये हैं चैलेंज?'

Indian Fashion Week.
New designes for Share brokers [:)]

26Sep2008

वैज्ञानिक दूरबीन से आकाश को देख रहा होता हैं. इतने मैं एक सरदार वहां पर आता हैं अचनाक एक तारा टूट कर गिरता हैं. तारे को टूट कर गिरते देख सरदार- अरे वह क्या निशाना हैं.

Hoax Effect

25Sep2008

Santa is driving down a road and sees a sign that says,
"Watch for Fallen Rocks."
A few kilometres later, he sees some rocks at the side of the road, so he stops and picks them up.
When he gets to the next town, he carries the rocks into the Highway Maintenance office and puts them on the counter."Here are your fallen rocks," he says to the man behind the counter. "Now where is my watch?".

Useful and beautiful tips for new DRINKERS

24Sep2008

मास्टर(सोते हुए विधार्थी को उठा कर)- तुम स्कूल क्यूं आते हो. विधार्थी- सर विद्या के लिए. मास्टर-फ़िर कक्षा में क्यों सो रहे हो. विधार्थी - सर आज विद्या नही आई न इसलिए.